Still standing

December 31st often comes with a certain kind of energy. It’s mostly celebratory, but for many of us it lands a little quieter than expected. And this year feels a lot like that, based on the conversations I’ve been having with folks. Less fireworks and more of an exhausted exhale.

But I also don’t think we need to succumb to the pressure to sum up the year in a single sentence that needs to make complete sense.

Because real life rarely fits neatly into a year-end caption. And that’s completely ok.

For many, 2025 was intensely demanding. Not always in large dramatic moments, but rather just… constant. Relentless. A year of showing up over and over. Sometimes tired, sometimes navigating uncertainty, but mostly managing responsibilities while carrying things no one else can see.

And yet, here we are!

And that’s pretty cool. Another year notched in the history books, and that matters more than we tend to acknowledge.

Because it’s important to remember that we don’t always have to win to succeed. Often, resilience is actually more about finding a way to stay in the game while staying true to who we are.

And before we rush to plan who we want to become next year, I think it’s worth pausing to recognize who we’ve already been this year.

Time for just one more fable in 2025 😉 

This one’s about the oak tree and the reed.

A violent storm tears through a valley. A large oak tree stands tall and rigid through the storm, proud of its strength, refusing to bend. The reed is long, thin, and unassuming. The reed bows low with each gust.

The storm blows on, pounding both the oak and the reed with the same force. And suddenly, there’s a huge crack. The storm subsides and the oak lies broken, snapped by its own resistance. The reed, bent but intact, rises again.

The reed’s strength is simple: it adapts and bends.

It’s a visual demonstration of resilience in action. And one we likely live each day.

So, if this year required us to bend more than we wanted to, that means we stayed responsive and fluid instead of rigid, all while remaining true to who we are. And I’ll take that kind of resilience every day of the week!

Why do we cling to the negative shit so much?

If we’re looking back on 2025 with a long exhale, here’s what’s happening in our brains. We’re wired to over-remember threat and under-remember adaptation. This means that we tend to linger more on what doesn’t go well rather than enjoy the positive results that come with success.

The amygdala (our threat detector) is fast and loud to store stress efficiently, and the quieter systems that track learning, growth, and competence don’t push as much for our attention. They only do that when we pause to reflect. So if we don’t take time to reflect, we miss the evidence that we’ve already handled hard things.

That’s why many of us might end the year feeling “behind”. It’s not that we didn’t grow, but more because we didn’t register that we did.

And let’s face it, even in the worst of years, we’re probably growing the most. Because that’s how growth works.

So, it’s valuable to remember that taking time to reflect is actually how resilience becomes visible. Instead of a long list of missed goals or a harsh audit of what didn’t happen, here are a couple of gentle ways to close the year with clarity.

Tool 1: A quiet resilience audit.

Keep it simple and let’s not overthink this. We just need to write three lines:

• One moment this year that stretched us

• One way we adapted or kept going (even if it wasn’t perfect)

• One strength we gained or improved because of it

That’s it.

We’re not looking for a cinematic comeback story with a fairytale ending. We’re just looking for proof of capability. And it’s almost always there…. if we take a few moments to look for it.

Tool 2: What are we carrying forward?

Here’s where we ask ourselves what the biggest lessons of 2025 were. The ones that we don’t want to forget.

It might be a boundary we learned to hold. A reminder about our energy. A truth about what actually mattered when things got noisy. For me it was an exact moment I lost my cool more than I wanted. I’ll spare you the details, but it remains vivid in my mind and it’s become a moment I’m now using to my advantage. I’ve written it down and converted it to a statement that I’ll see regularly on my quest forward into another year.

I always say that resilience is a skill. It’s something we develop and increase through practicing tools like these easy ones mentioned above. But they take a few minutes and we have to invest in those moments. We must do the work.

Every person reading this made it through every moment flung at them this year, even when it felt overwhelming! That’s awesome. And that’s also growth. And if you recovered faster than you used to, well that’s definitely increased resilience.

So before we turn the page on 2025, land it properly with a quiet acknowledgment that we all handled more than we thought we could.

And we’re still here, still standing, which is a strong place to begin again.

Until next time friends, stay resilient and Happy New Year!

Carré @ Resilient Minds

PS - if you’ve got a spare minute, please rate this newsletter below or hit reply to let me know what you think of it. I always aim to make it relevant so I’d love your honest opinion. The more critical the feedback, the better! I can handle it 😀 See you in 2026!