The best in the world miss more than anyone

The Football World Cup just started, and it’s hard not to be romantic about football.

Or soccer, if we prefer to call it that.

Each game always feels bigger than the actual game, and we saw amazing scenes of Korean fans partying with Mexican fans to celebrate their wins, and Australians taking over Vancouver to cheer on the Socceroos as they showed the Turkish team what “Aussie Spirit” means. Football is a game on the edge, where one kick can turn a player into a hero, a villain, or sometimes both, depending on the result.

It’s a game that is very much like life. There is victory, and there is loss. There is heartbreak, and there is celebration. Moments when we think things are going our way, and then something crazy happens and we’re thrown into chaos and confusion.

Sport offers so many analogies that we can use for life, but the one that I often come back to is about the debate for who is the greatest of all time: Messi vs Ronaldo.

Because here’s the interesting fact that most people forget: Ronaldo and Messi have both missed the most about of penalty shots in history. Ronaldo is leading and has missed 36. Messi has missed 32.

I love the idea that the two greatest players of our generation are also the two players who’ve missed the most from the spot. And yet they still step up when the opportunity arrives. We have to wonder where they got that confidence and resilience…. so here are three stories of football legends who showcase why resilience matters in life and sport.

Cristiano Ronaldo: Build

Ronaldo’s story has been built on ambition, pressure and relentless self-construction. It’s a wonderful demonstration that the obstacle that stands in the way often becomes the way.

At 12, he left the island of Madeira and moved to mainland Portugal to join a football academy. He was a boy, suddenly separated from his family, trying to make his way in a new place. At 15, he had surgery for a racing heart condition. For a young athlete trying to build a career around speed, power and stamina, that could have been the moment fear took over.

But Ronaldo channeled that fear into discipline. He became ruthless with his training. He built himself, obsessing over each detail to become stronger, faster, sharper and more prepared than almost everyone around him. And when we see him on the pitch, it’s clear he is an amazing physical specimen.

The tool here is about evidence. Reminding ourselves that we’re capable of more than we think. At the end of each day, we can write down one small thing we did that proves we’re becoming the person we want to be. It could be as simple as reading this newsletter.

Confidence can often be built when we look back and realize that we actually took some useful steps.

Lionel Messi: Adapt

Messi is not very tall. He never has been. As a boy in Argentina, he was small enough to earn the nickname “the Flea.” At age 11, he was diagnosed with a growth hormone deficiency which was a condition that required expensive treatment his family could not easily sustain. FC Barcelona eventually invited him to Spain and helped cover the medical support he needed.

Still, the way forward would require adaptability.

He was never interested in becoming the strongest player. Rather, he chose to focus on maintaining a low centre of gravity that would provide him balance, acceleration, control, and, (perhaps most importantly) patience. When we watch him, we’ll see that he walks a lot, conserving energy, scanning the field, waiting, and then exploding into the game.

Many of us might waste enormous energy wishing we had a different body, personality, background, budget, team or circumstance. But the better question we should be asking is the one Messi asked: “what’s the advantage hidden inside what I already have?”

Luka Modric: Protect

Modric’s childhood was shaped by war. As a young boy in Croatia, his family was forced to flee their home during the Croatian War of Independence. His grandfather was killed, his family became refugees, and Modric spent years living in hotels. His childhood was filled to the brim with uncertainty.

And, in the middle of all that instability, he found football to be his grounding mechanism. He would play in parking lots, hotel corridors, small spaces…. anywhere that he could improve.

Years later, he won the award for the player judged to be the best in the world, and also led Croatia to a World Cup final. Playing in his 5th World Cup right now, he has become one of the most respected midfielders of his generation.

The idea here is, when life feels chaotic, we can choose one small thing that keeps us connected to who we are. A walk. A workout. A journal. It just needs to take 10 minutes. We never control all of the conditions around us, but we can often protect one space where our identity, energy and hope can keep growing.

Ronaldo misses. Messi misses. Modric misses. And, on top of that, each of these players had to rebuild from things most of us can barely imagine.

The great ones always find a way to keep moving forward. They miss shots and still step up to take the next one. They’re told they’re too small and find a new way to play. They grow up around uncertainty and still protect something beautiful.

Resilience is the ability to keep walking toward the ball, even when we know there is a chance we might miss. And, if the greatest players in the world can miss, recover, adapt and keep going, maybe we can give ourselves a little more permission to do the same.

Until next time friends, stay resilient.

Carré @ Resilient Minds

I help individuals, teams, and young people build the resilience skills to meet life’s challenges with greater confidence and calm. Whether you want to feel healthier and happier, perform better under pressure, or navigate change more effectively, resilience provides the tools to keep moving forward. Reply here to explore training for your team or one-to-one coaching.