Move on, immediately

In 1914, Thomas Edison’s factory burned to the ground. Edison was 67 at the time. The fire destroyed years of research, prototypes, and progress. All gone in a single night.

As he watched the blaze consume everything, his son Charles stood next to him, devastated. Edison, always calm amidst chaos, turned to him and said:

"Go get your mother and all her friends. They'll never see a fire like this again."

No panic. No blame. No dwelling. Just a clear-minded decision to move on. Immediately.

Within weeks, Edison had restarted production. Within a year, he’d invented the alkaline storage battery, one of his most notable innovations.

He didn’t ignore what happened. He just didn’t get stuck in it.

Now for a story of my flat tire.

This past weekend, I was reminded of this lesson in a much more everyday way.

On Sunday, I lazily clipped the curb while parking outside our house and put a slit in the side of my tire. It was a small bump, but as I emerged from the car, I heard the loud hiss…. and it was done. I watched that tire deflate to complete flatness.

I have two things I can now tell you about flat tires:

1) A slit in the side of the tire means that the tire is toast. You can’t repair it.

2) If your car has ‘All-Wheel Drive’, you’re in trouble when one tire goes. The system relies on all tires having the same tread so you often have to replace all four.

As I learnt all of this, I couldn’t help but regret my actions. It was going to be an expensive and annoying reminder of my inattention. I kept replaying the moment I pulled up, wishing I could go back 30 seconds and park more carefully.

But of course life doesn’t work like that.

A few days and phone calls later, with a $1,028 bill, I picked up my car with a brand-new set of tires…. and a healthy reminder of why lingering never helps.

It made me think of the Edison story that I’d heard years ago, and it put things into immediate perspective. He’d moved forward from losing nearly everything. I could move forward from a tire!

Move on, immediately

To move on immediately doesn’t mean that we ignore it or pretend it didn’t happen. It simply means that we don’t let it affect us more than it has to. We should acknowledge it, learn from it, accept it, and then let go of the parts we can’t change.

In fact, there are lessons in reflection (and even regret), but that only gets us so far. The right way forward is forward. And we can shift the story.

As demonstrated by Edison, great business people do this. Great leaders do this. Great parents, athletes, creatives, teammates, and partners do this too. They spend more time looking forward than looking back.

Easier said than done, right? Well here are a few simple ways to practice moving on.

1. Name the lesson, not the loss. It’s our opportunity to focus on what the moment gave us, not what it took from us. In my case, it was a reminder to pay more attention when managing a vehicle! In any tough situation at the office, there will always be a lesson available. For example, a missed sale will hold plenty of insight for the next one.

2. Ask “what’s next?” instead of “what if?”. This was probably the first one that kicked in for me. I started to think about what I needed to do to get my car back asap. We have summer camps to attend this week, baseball practice, errands to run. It didn’t take long to replace regret with forward-looking action that will literally keep our family moving this week.

3. Say this out loud: “it’s done.” I find that a verbal cue can help my brain accept the finality and release it. It is what it is. Of course, a few other words in there can also be somewhat therapeutic! But announcing it to the universe helps make it feel final.

4. Redirect our attention with purpose. This is similar to asking “what’s next?” but if we can’t find something immediate that creates momentum, we can shift to something else that feeds our energy. When the dust settled, I used it as a good opportunity to show the kids how car tires worked. They were fascinated to see the tire so flat, so it was kind of funny to see their reactions, and we’ve had many laughs about it since!

5. Shift our physical state. Move. Whatever it takes to shift our energy. We can stand up, breathe deeply, go for a run, or move our body to reset our mental focus.

Random and frustrating moments are part of life and work. But we don’t have to carry them longer than we need to.

The real power of resilience is in learning to let go and move on, immediately.

And just in case you’re wondering, yes, I live and breathe this work. And yes, I still have moments like these.

We all do.

Because I always say that I’m a student of resilience, just like you.

And that’s why we’re here.

Until next time friends, stay resilient.

Carre @ Resilient Minds.

PS - I need your help if you can spare 2 more mins please. I’m conducting research on resilience at the office. This quick survey will help me better serve the needs of modern businesses.